What's The Real Meaning of Smarch?

Well boys and girls.  It's time for you to learn what Smarch (and the rest of the Guentherian calendar) is all about!

Smarch is a time of appreciation and giving.  It was also a clever way to disguise my birthday.  As you look at the Guentherian calendar you'll notice Smarch is the thirteenth month of the year.  This is a deliberate reference to the episode of the Simpsons "It was the thirteenth day of the thirteen month"  "Lousy Smarch weather."  For some reason 45 came to my mind when I claimed it as my birthday.  That's why Smarch has 45 days.  To finish up the rest of the year (320 days) I figured that the rest of the months should have an even number of days because the thing I hate most of all is that every month has their own number of days that makes absolutely no sense.  This was a clever way to get around that.  Thusly 16 easily went into 320, so that all other months would have that many days.  So overall we have 21 months.

Naming them of course took several years to finally decide on.  Most notable of the months are Shmoopuary (as seen in the popular Dilbert comic), Zxcvb a month consisting of all consonants (also a parody of QWERTY you see every so often), and of course Aieouio (vowels, duh).

I attempted to name all of the days of the week, but decided it wasn't funny.  So in tribute to Family Guy I threw a Katilsday at the end.  (Although it just means its Monday of next week in case I get lazy so I have another day if I need it.)

So there, boys and girl, you now know the wonderful history and beautiful beauty of the Guentherian Calendar.  That's right, it was a lame joke that I've refused to let die.  I really hate people celebrating my birthday! :-D

Ciao Corpsters