Let's Not Watch

There's tons of reasons not to watch the so-called "big game" and few reasons to. Not to mention the fad of just watching it for the commercials which people are still feeling clever about. Why should you not care come Sunday? Here's my reasons...

1. Church- while the "Big Game" (can't legally say the copywritten name on most media so I'm not taking any risks) doesn't start til most church's activities are long over, people enjoy watching the prepreprepregame shows.

2. It's boring- you see one football game you've seen em all I say.

3. Heart Attacks- people are seriously having heart problems because of all the so-called anxiety they experience from watching said game. I have no first-hand experience of this... but there ya go.

4. There's probably something better on- self explanatory. Puppy Bowl on Animal Planet.

5. Commercials are stupid- there I said it. Watching for the commercials is probably one of the dumbest things I've ever heard. Those are the parts of the show I usually have my eyes glaze over or get distracted by something more interesting... like the dog sleeping and doing nothing.

6. It's overly hyped- think about those early year so-called gotta see flicks. They all stink. Publicity is usually a good sign that a show/movie/sports event needs to fool people that a boring piece of bleep is worth watching. The best shows don't even need to advertise.

7. Too much money spent on ads- I don't trust an event they charge so much for ads on. Or the fact people spend millions on a sport that people actually make careers out of. A stupid career plan, if I say so myself. It's much worse than wanting to be a minister. Both take no speaking skills whatsoever.

8. Fatty foods- most people watching said sports events feel some weird desire to load up on the salty fatty snacks to sit and watch the game. Sitting plus super fattening foods leads to extra heart attacks making reason 2 all the more strong. Something weird about supporting professional sports when you're a fat lazy couch potato who never touched a football in his life.

That's all I can think of I'm sure there's tons more reasons not to watch. Don't be feeling smug Valentine's Day... your time for a beat down is coming soon.